Because I'm actually a 7-year-old boy

Hey lovelies,

I have to share my embarrassment and the awesomeness.  What's so awesome?  7 fantastic tools for starting fires with style.  Why embarrassing?  Because my sheer excitement to see magnesium flints, drip torches and a really effing powerful laser.

I'm 7!

Here's pics of my new favorite toys:  
 

 S3 Artic Laser with the power to burn a hole through paper, plastic, wood, and probably a wall.  Excellent.  All yours for the low low price of $300.

 
At about half the cost, make fire rain from this spout.  I'd really like to see a drip torch in action.  I'd really like to be the person putting it in action.  

 
Aurora magnesium fire starter.  Flick a knife over the surface and watch the sparks rain down.  Awesome.  It's only $20, so feasible.  As a birthday present for my brother.  And myself.  

 
Cool.  If you're a boy scout and it's 1950.    
(It's a bow and drill, in case you didn't know.  It also almost looks like it could shoot flaming arrows, which would be cooler.) 

  
But if those are all too flashy, a $4 box of strike-anywheres will always get the job done.  


Here's the Complete list.
But I covered the most fun ones.  

Jeez, I am such a pyro.  And now that I've disturbed your Monday morning and possibly made you wonder what I'm going to end up burning down, I've got some magnesium flints to purchase online.