Cylon, I saw this on a lovely website I peruse sometimes while at work. I mean, I work all the time. I mean, I was on break at the time. Probably. And I immediately thought of you.
http://www.buzzfeed.com/whitneyjefferson/guy-is-obsessed-with-becoming-a-mermaid
Your welcome.
Also, as I was Skyping with Ada (who also saw this page), she decided we should all buy his tails and swim in a lagoon. I wholeheartedly agree.