Music Video Masochism

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I know I shouldn't care (and I'm sure you don't care), but Lady Gaga's new music video is pissing me off because it represents everything that's wrong with her.

If you have seen it yet, you can by clicking here. Go ahead. I'll wait.

Done? Good.

So if you didn't take time to watch it (I'm shocked), here's a brief recap. This video features Lady Gaga "dancing" around (really more writhing) in different ridiculous outfits.

 . . . oh, I thought I would have more to say about it, but nope. That pretty much sums it up. That's the whole plot of the video. It looks a little something like this-

1. Hand Bra

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2. Painted Face Which I Thought Could End Up Interesting After Seeing Concept Art But Wasn't

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3. I Can't Fucking Even With You Sometimes

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What's most embarrassing about this whole ordeal for is that I actually got excited about this video for half a second. I know, I know, after years of slowly coming to the realization that Lady Gaga isn't nearly as artistic as she pretends I should know better. It's just, well . . .

Do you remember the first time you ever watched the video for Bad Romance? I fell in love immediately. It blew my mind.

Not only did it fit with the song, it added another level to it.The costumes and sets were amazing and there were actual characters and a build and a climax.

If music videos aren't going to have a good story, that's totally fine, but they need to make up for it with a fascinating/distinctive concept or impressive visuals.

These visuals are cool, but they piss me off. They remind me of her video for You And I more than anything. Disjointed. Bizarre. Nonsensical. Ultimately, they're jarring and go by so fast and contrast so wildly it's hard to get into that.

But what ESPECIALLY pisses me off, is the way she flashes enough skin to get the PTA all hot bothered while still managing to be censored enough so you can play it on TV. The first time I watched this video I swore to god I saw her nipples, but it turned out to be a special bra made of a melted tinfoil.

She's like a sexy Marilyn Manson, except I've seen Marilyn Manson's boobs! Granted, he didn't have any nipples at the time, but still.

Do you know what I most want to see from Lady Gaga? Just a ten minute video of her singing an acoustic on an empty sound stage while bare-ass naked. All respect regained immediately.

But she'll never do that, because she's not a performance artist. She's a cookie cutter pop star indistinguishable from Katy Perry or Taylor Swift. This song is pretty much Lady Gaga's answer to Circus by Britney Spears.

What it really comes down to is I'm mad. Not mad at Lady Gaga. She's a pop star and she's good at it. Mad at myself for paying attention to Top 40 bullshit rather than taking the time to seek out and find real art.

Goddamnit, I need to go read something. I'll be back.

Under Construction

Still working on my sci fi novel, but here is a sampling of something in construction I have been working on:

This place among the stars; centered among the infantismal. It populates the great powers, it manages order, it exists for the purpose of power. This place among the infinite cosmos has chosen the ruler who will bring them to glory. For every ruler brings glory. They will be crush the detractors, whom dare speak against the burgeoning line in the wake of the end of the previous line. For generations the new line will bring sustenance to the people.

She is our Queen Hope. Commence Hope Year One of her glorious reign and the reign of her line!

It's unofficially official

I have a job.  A real one.  Not a temp thing, not a contract, not a goddamn internship.

I will be transitioning to a full time permanent employee with a salary and everything, probably by next Friday.

I hope this news finds you all well.  And soon perhaps, I will be able to take a vacation to see each of you.  Yes, you too Ada.  Though, I may wait until next year when you are in Oz.

Cheers and much love,
Allya

Cue the OK GO

 . . .
 . . .
 . . .
 . . . I'm getting a crush on a guy I work with.

He's nerdy and awkward and into computer stuff (he's our programming guy), and I thought he was in his thirties but he recently revealed that he saw the first Pokemon Movie in sixth grade which I think makes him just a few years older than me.

We like all of the same TV shows (Doctor Who, the IT Crowd, Spaced, Metalocalypse, Venture Bros). He also seems kind of immature (he's talked A LOT about his ex) and said he didn't want to have a daughter because he was worried she would grow up to be a slut. (That was a weird conversation.)

I can't help it. Nerdy guys are my Kryptonite.

I ALSO have a crush on this super, super, super, super nice guy that works at the record store. He has long, straight brown hair down his back and wears nothing but metal shirts. (Yeah, I know. Look familiar?) We had a huge storm recently and I sent him a message asking if they were okay (the power was out for a day and a half).

He said they were, and then said, "I hope you're okay too, lady."

Did I mention he's like the nicest fucking guy? And has tattoos. And wants to brew his own beer.

I don't know what the point of this post is. Except maybe that I never learn. Also, I think I need to get laid. I'm about to jump on the next guy I see.